I have this fire burning inside of me. It’s telling me that “It’s okay to not be okay”. What I mean by that is, it’s okay to not have it all together. One of the reasons I started my blog was to show that it’s okay to be a work in progress and that yes, sometimes the struggle is real.
But how you choose to react is what is most important. With the growth of social media and influencers displaying their glamour shots 24/7 it can make you feel inadequate or like you’re not keeping up with everyone else. I can admit that I fall victim to this kind of thinking all the time. When I go to post a photo on Instagram sometimes I catch myself doubting if anyone will like it or if someone else had a better photo than mine and I shouldn’t post it. If I post a selfie I will stare at it long enough to think I look ugly and end up deleting it.
These are the toxic thoughts, self sabotage, that prohibit us from living our best lives. I find that I tend to run on a hamster wheel everyday: work, workout, bed, repeat. Sometimes weeks or even months go by before I see my best friends and when I do we all seem to agree in one way or another that we’re struggling. It actually makes me feel better to know that I’m not the only one stressing about bills or every day obstacles.
With the end of the year coming up and 2019 around the corner I need to make a better effort to just be real, authentic, and honest. Sometimes life doesn’t hand you everything on a silver platter, sometimes you’ll be sipping beer until you can afford champagne, sometimes you have to put in the effort day after day and slowly see results until you reach your goals.
One of the best lessons I’ve learned this year, well mainly the last 6 months, has been throughout my weight loss journey and that is to take everything one day at a time. I knew I wasn’t going to lose weight overnight and I also knew I wasn’t going to lose the weight if I didn’t make the necessary effort and stay consistent. I started preplanning my workouts and meal prepping on the weekends. I even got my boyfriend to start meal prepping meals with me so that we had food ready to go during the week and didn’t have to ask each other the dreaded, “What’s for dinner?” question.
I took this same logic and started printing out blank monthly calendars and filling in all the dates I had bills or utilities due. I also marked when my pay days were so I could better manage when things were due or if I had an event coming up and needed to put a little extra money aside. My current goal is to pay down (off!) credit card debt since my boyfriend and I are planning to move back downtown to Chicago from our current place in Schaumburg in the spring. I know that I’ll be paying more in rent and there will be tons of restaurants and activities I’ll want to do which is motivation for me to get rid of as much excess debt as I can. Because of this, I’m not spending money every weekend out at the bars or buying myself a new pair of shoes and posting them to my Instagram. Sure, you can say I’m a little jealous but I’m also putting my future first and doing things that may not easily reflect on social media but reflect in my overall happiness.
Don’t be discouraged if you’re working on bettering yourself and that involves making some sacrifices. Some of the best entrepreneurs devoted their time and energy to their passions while others took the easy road of going out and paryting every weekend and going on vacation 2-3 times a year. Now, there’s nothing wrong with a little fun here and there but there are things that can’t be captured in an Instagram or a SnapChat post and that is okay.
Going back to my weight loss journey, I have spent on average 5, 6, sometimes 7 nights in the gym. I don’t always post a “It didn’t happen if you didn’t take a selfie at the gym” but I make sure that when I’m there I fully immerse myself in a good workout and sweating my ass off. It’s my physical form of therapy. I’ve basically hibernated at the gym with little to no social contact or Netflix binges on the weekends but you wouldn’t really know that from my social media would you? I may not be out at a different restaurant every night with a glass of wine or taking photos in my Architectural Digest lookalike home but those are goals I have for later down the road. Right now the path I’m on is dedicated to positive health and wellness.
For the people that are in the position of posting their highlight reels on social media, good for you. I hope one day to be as successful as you. I have learned to stop being petty in regards to not having what they have and knowing that every thing happens to people at different stages in their lives. Where I’m at is completely different from anyone online or in real life and that is a beautiful thing.
My life may not be as glamorous and my story may not be as interesting but that shouldn’t prevent me from telling it.
I hope that if you feel like you’re not doing enough or as far in your life as you thought you’d be you read this and know that you’re not alone. There’s no such thing as FOMO (fear of missing out) because there isn’t a guide book for how to live your life, especially in the age of social media.