I spend a lot of my free time scrolling through Pinterest. Half of it is daydreaming about what I want my life to look like and the other half is steps to take of what I want my life to look like. Sometimes I think though, no matter how I look on the outside it doesn’t change what is on the inside. Inside, there is a girl ready to embrace her inner self. There is a girl who is ready to face the world with a smile and live her best fucking life.
I am doing the best I can and within reason I should be happy about that. I watch the show Botched and it actually makes me realize how fortunate I am that I don’t have anything wrong with my body the way it is. The changes happening to my body are all thanks to me. I’ve started hitting the gym and lifting weights. I’ve started drinking two protein shakes a day. I’ve started appreciating all the things my body does for me. I think the emphasis on weight management needs to be more on the mental than the physical aspect of it. I don’t mind going to the gym but it’s when I’m actually there that I need to remind myself why I’m there. I don’t mind cooking food but it’s the why behind what I’m cooking that fuels my body to keep me healthy. When I gained weight, I wasn’t thinking about what I was eating or how often I was working out. Once I got things together I took a step back and realized I was at my heaviest I’ve ever been and realized I needed to make a change.
I needed to not only look at the scale as a motivator but I needed to look at myself and ask myself, “Why do I want to lose weight?” The obvious was that I was overweight and wanted to get back down to where I had been. I also wanted to fit into my clothes comfortably without feeling like a cat trying to fit through a small door. What would happen to me when I lost the weight? Would I feel confident? Probably. Would my bf be proud of me? Absolutely. Would I carry myself differently knowing I had just lost 30+ pounds? For sure!
Losing weight is as much a mental game as it is a physical one. Once I began to accept my why, I began to plot out my attack. I began researching all types of diets and workouts to see which ones I could get my body to start doing. I read every article on Popsugar Fitness and pinned every healthy recipe to Pinterest. I did the leg work for sure. I started going to the gym at first 2-3 times a week. Then it became 3-4 and then I got up to the 5-7 range. I loved the routine feeling of showing up to the gym. I started to recognize the same people after a few weeks. I loved going and starting out with some cardio to warm up and then weights. Depending on how packed it is I can usually do everything I want to. I’d say I’ve been going to the gym for a good solid 2 months now and can notice a change in definition in my arms.
When you’re starting out, even if you fall off for a few days, document with photos! I took a photo of myself at my heaviest last November and then recently took some photos at the end of June to compare and it’s incredible the difference. My stomach has slimmed down as well as my arms. It definitely gave me the added boost to keep up the good work. I’m down 15 pounds from that heaviest and now I’m fluctuating with this next 10 pounds I’ve made my goal.
The thing is, I’m no fitness expert or Instagram model. I’m just me. If I can just write down my journey as I’m living it then why not? Just like taking a photo to track my progress, writing this down will be great to look back on in a year once I’ve hit my goal. Working out is such a process but it’s also so rewarding in and of itself.